infinite curse of a lonely heart
by Waffles Of Doom
Summary: five times tom realises maddy will never go for him, and the one time he wishes rhydian had never arrived at all / oneshot, maddy/rhydian, maddy/tom


**one**

The first time was on the holy island. He had wanted to sit next to Maddy on the bus journey - _he had even saved her a seat - _ but she and Rhydian arrived with barely a minute to spare and flopped into two free seats at the front, excitedly talking and laughing.

They acted like a pair of hyperactive kids that whole trip, bouncing off each other, Maddy demanding piggy backs left, right and centre. It was almost as if they couldn't keep their hands off each other.

_(it was definitely as though they couldn't keep their hands off each other)_

Anytime they had to pair up that trip, Maddy and Rhydian immediately moved to work together, and even when they were in groups, it looked (to Tom at least) as though Maddy and Rhydian barely noticed that he and Shannon were there too.

The two of them had a lot in common, he guessed. But Maddy had been his friend for so much longer. Why couldn't he have the same chance as Rhydian?

He repeatedly told Shannon he thought they were dating, supposedly to convince her, but more to convince himself, if he was being honest. Tom knew his feelings for Maddy were changing, and he thought that if he convinced himself Rhydian and Maddy were going out, he would forget about them.

It wasn't as if he had a chance with her, anyway. He might as well save himself the heartbreak.

**two**

The next time was in the darkroom. Maddy was acting weird, and looking incredibly _hot_, his hair streaked brightly and her eyes blackened with eyeliner. She looked different, and Tom found himself feeling different about her.

He had tried his best not to, but the heart wants what the heart wants.

Tom was going to go and tell her, be honest with the girl he had been friends with forever. Maddy would have to understand, wouldn't she? And maybe, maybe she'd feel the same! Tom wasn't so bad, or at least he didn't think he was.

His palms were sweating as he approached the darkroom, his heart beating rapidly as he stopped in front of the door, trying to calm himself down, even just a little. He grabbed the handle of the darkroom, taking a deep breath before pushing the door open.

And found Rhydian and Maddy in a (_slightly) _compromising position. Their foreheads were pressed together, their chests heaving. He couldn't tell if they had just kissed, or were about to. All he knew was he needed to get out of there, and fast.

Wordlessly, he turned around, and bolted from the room. Tom heard the darkroom door slam shut behind him, and he tried to push away the images of what Maddy and Rhydian could be doing to the back of his mind.

He really didn't want to think about it, because it made him feel physically _ill_.

Tom rushed down the stairs, out into yard, gulping in deep breaths of fresh air.

How could he have been such an idiot? Maddy was never going to go for him. Not if _Rhydian _was around, anyway.

**three**

Tom woke with a start as Shannon kicked him, biting back a yell as her foot made contact with his shin. "Shan, what are you-" He stopped when he saw that Shannon was still fast asleep, her face pressed into her pillow.

Next time they had a sleepover, he was sleeping on the opposite side of the room to Shannon. As if it wasn't bad enough that she talked in her sleep, she apparently kicked in her sleep too.

Tom sat up sleepily, looking around for the bottle of water he knew was on the floor somewhere. Finally finding it wedged underneath Maddy's bag, he unscrewed the cap, gulping half of it down in one go.

It was an unnaturally warm evening, and it didn't help that the four of them were sleeping in Shannon's box room either. It felt like a _sauna_.

Tom looked around as he heard someone else shift, hoping that maybe Maddy had woken up. It would be nice to be able to talk to his best friend, no interruptions.

Maddy however, hadn't woken up. She had just moved in her sleep - moved closer to Rhydian. She was practically sleeping on top of him now, her head resting against his chest, an arm wrapped around his upper torso.

God, even when he was sleeping Rhydian still had a better chance with Maddy than he ever did, didn't he?

Tom was about to turn over, and try and get back to sleep, when Rhydian moved, his eyes flickering open. He didn't seem to notice that Tom was awake, his attention on Maddy. Tom watched as Rhydian smiled softly, wrapping an arm around Maddy, pulling her closer to him as he closed his eyes, smiling contentedly.

Yeah, not a chance.

**four**

"Maddy?" Shannon sighed into her phone, sitting down on her couch. "Where are you? You were meant to be here an hour ago. Is everything alright? Call me when you get this."

She hung up the call, tossing it onto the coffee table. "Where are they?"

Tom folded his arms across his chest, sitting back in his chair. "Probably off snogging somewhere." He replied gruffly.

"Whats your problem?"

"Problem? What makes you think I have a problem?"

"Because you've been Mr Grumpy Pants all night." Shannon rolled her eyes. "Come on Tom, if you've got something to say, say it."

"Wow Shannon, that really makes me want to talk to you."

Shannon rolled her eyes. "Okay. Tom, as your friend, I would like to know what is bothering you. Better?"

Tom hesitated before he replied. "What has Rhydian got that I don't?" He blurted.

"He has better hair." Shannon said absently.

"Shan!"

"Sorry!" Shannon said, turning to face Tom. "I suppose it's a matter of taste, really. I find Rhydian a bit too broody and annoying sometimes."

"And what about me?"

"You're nice."

"Just nice?"

"What do you want me to say Tom?" Shannon sighed. "I think you're nice, you're one of my best friends."

"But what if I'm just nice? Do girls like nice guys?"

"Yeah.." Shannon said, her eyes widening slightly. "You're jealous!"

"Pshh, no, I'm not."

"Tom, you're jealous. Of _Rhydian_." Shannon said. "You like Maddy!" She said triumphantly.

"I just.." Tom said. "I've been her friend for so long, and it feels like she's abandoning me for Rhydian. You know?"

"No."

"Try see it from my point of view."

"Oh yes Tom, I'll develop a crush on Maddy _just _for you."

"I just wish she'd spend more time with me Shan." Tom admitted.

"Then ask her to! Ask her to Bernies for hot chocolate or something." Shannon said. "There's no use in moping around, and not trying to do anything about it. Why do you think I organised tonight?"

"She hasn't turned up yet." Tom said pointedly.

Before Shannon could reply, the doorbell went. "That better be her," She said, heading for the front door. "Or I'll actually kill her."

Tom sat further back into his chair as Shannon answered the door, two breathless voices giving her rushed apologies for being late.

"Tom's in the living room." He heard Shannon say. "We've got the film set up inside."

"Brilliant Shan!" Maddy's bright voice drifted down the hallway. "We've got chocolate."

"And drinks."

"Hiya Tom!" Maddy greeted brightly as she entered the living room, dumping her bag on the table. Her cheeks were flushed bright red, and her hair was a mess, something she clearly knew herself, considering she was running her hands through it, trying to get it to sit flat.

Rhydian's face was just as flushed, his blonde hair ruffled as he flopped down on the couch, kicking off his sneakers.

"Why were you two so late?" Shannon asked, hitting playing on the DVD player before sitting down next to Maddy.

"We uh, we had to go and buy the chocolate." Maddy said, not sounding in any way convincing. Rhydian tried to hide his laughter at her words, Maddy hitting him in the leg as he did so.

"It takes an hour to buy chocolate?" Tom raised an eyebrow.

"Nah, mam and dad wouldn't let us leave without having dinner." Maddy said. "Right Rhydian?"

"Yeah, they want to make sure I don't starve when my foster parents are away." Rhydian said.

_God, they were lying through their teeth.._

"Will you be quiet and watch the film?" Shannon said. "Can you get the lights Rhydian?"

Rhydian nodded, reaching back and hitting the light switch.

Tom turned his focus to the movie, watching as the starting titles began to roll. A soft giggle from Maddy drew his attention. It was hard to make out what her and Rhydian were doing in the dim light, but she was leaning her head on his shoulder - and he was _almost _certain they were holding hands.

Tom barely bit back a sigh. Like he **ever **had a bloody chance.

**five**

The looks were the worst, Tom concluded. However bad it was to see Rhydian and Maddy laugh, and mess about with each other, the looks were worse. They seemed to be able to communicate with a glance these days, a simple look.

He hated it.

Tom wished that he was the one on the recieving end of those looks, that he knew what they meant. He wished he knew exactly when Maddy wanted to leave, or do something else, that he could just look at her and she'd know exactly what he was trying to say.

_(of course, she'd have to tear her eyes away from Rhydian for more than two seconds for that to even begin to happen..)_

He really, really hated having to watch their stupid, silent conversations. He _really _hated not knowing what they were talking about these days, and he _**really**_ hated that Rhydian was taking his best friend away from him with his stupid grin and his stupid looks.

Yeah, Tom hated the looks the most - because it was those stupid looks and silent conversations that were making Maddy give a rushed apology before grabbing her bag, and Rhydian, and practically bolting from Bernies.

"You okay?" Shannon inquired.

"Yeah, I'm fine Shan." Tom lied, looking at the now closed front door of the cafe.

_Unrequited love was such a bitch.._

**and the one time he wished rhydian had never arrived at all**

"Happy birthday Maddy." Shannon smiled, hugging her best friend tightly, handing her the neatly wrapped present.

"Thanks Shan." Maddy beamed, tucking a chunk of her dark hair behind her ear as she ripped the paper off, revealing the photograph filled frame inside. They were all photos of her and Shannon, from when they were kids, till now. "Shan! I love it, thank you."

"Happy birthday Mads." Tom said, giving her a one armed hug, the large photo frame getting in the way.

Maddy set the photo frame down on the table, taking the present from him. "Thanks Tom!" She set about trying to unwrap the present, picking at the sellotape.

"Are you sure you used enough sellotape there mate?" Rhydian grinned as Maddy pulled at the wrapping, the tape not budging in the slightest.

"Mam, can I have a scissors?" Maddy asked, looking over at her mam, who was arranging candles on her cake.

"Rhydian, can you get the scissors there love?" Emma said.

Rhydian nodded, bounding into the kitchen, rooting around in one of the drawers for the scissors.

"Ah, ouch!" Maddy yelped, catching her thumb on the edge of the wrapping paper.

"Sorry, I didn't realise I had wrapped it that badly.."

"Its fine Tom," Maddy reassured him with a grin. "Its all part of the challenge, right?"

"Right." Tom smiled.

"Here Mads." Rhydian passed her the scissors, Maddy easily ripping the paper apart with the blades. "Ah, brilliant! I've wanted to read this for ages, thanks Tom! I can't wait to read this now."

"I think you have one more present first Mads." Emma smiled, looking at Rhydian, who was holding a neatly wrapped box behind his back.

"Who, me? Nah, I don't have anything for you Mads." Rhydian grinned.

"Rhydian! Give me my present!" Maddy laughed, fake pouting.

"Nope."

"You're horrible."

"You love it though."

Maddy rolled her eyes, pressing her lips to his softly. "Now, give me my present!"

Rhydian kissed her again before handing her the present. "Happy birthday Mads."

Maddy eagerly ripped the paper off her present, her eyes widening as she did so. "You didn't!"

"I did." Rhydian grinned.

"Rhydian Morris, you are actually the best person on the entire planet." Maddy threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly.

"What is it?" Shannon said, her nose wrinkling.

"Those xbox controls Maddy saw last month when we were in town." Emma said. "She hasn't stopped talking about them since, has she?"

"No she hasn't." Daniel agreed.

"I seriously love you." Maddy said to Rhydian, kissing him eagerly, her hands on his cheeks,, pulling him closer to her.

"Alright you two, break it up." Emma laughed, Maddy and Rhydian completely ignoring her.

Tom swallowed uncomfortably. Rhydian and Maddy had been together for months now, and he still wasn't used to it, seeing them be all _couple-y._

"Okay, come on Maddy, before your cake goes on fire." Emma said, reaching across and tickling her daughter's sides.

Maddy disconnected the kiss with a laugh. "Mam! You know I hate being tickled."

"Why d'you think we all do it then?" Rhydian smirked.

"Don't you dare."

"Don't I dare do what? This?" Rhydian easily grabbed her by the waist, tickling her.

"R-Rhydian! Stop it you idiot!" Maddy said through her laughter.

"Stop what?" Rhydian grinned, still tickling her.

"Come on Rhydian, I want cake!" Shannon said, shaking her head at their antics.

"Fiiine."

Maddy headed for the kitchen table, setting Rhydian's present down next to her others.

Tom stood on the other side of the table, watching as everyone sang Maddy happy birthday, Rhydian standing next to her, one arm loosely wrapped around her waist. They looked so comfortable, and happy together.

And he hated it.

Okay, he was glad Maddy was happy and all that, but he still hated it. He wanted to be the one standing next to her, be able to kiss her and make her laugh, and hear her say that she loved him what felt like every other minute.

Tom didn't care how bad it sounded, he wished Rhydian had **never** moved to Stoneybrook, that he had never become friends with Maddy, or anyone.

Because maybe, if Rhydian had never arrived, if he had never come to Stoneybrook in the first place, well, Tom might have had a chance with her.

Now he **never **did. How could he compete with Rhydian Morris?

Yeah, Tom wished that Rhydian Morris had never set foot within ten miles of Stoneybrook.

**fin**

**Author's Note**; I'm not entirely happy with this ending, but I've edited it to death at this stage, and changed it about a million times, so.. yes.. Anyway, this is based off a prompt from the lovely Amy, who gave it to me months and months ago at this stage, and I fully apologise for taking so long!

Also, if you sent me a prompt for 'ninety nine ways to say i love you' I faithfully promise I will do them all, school is just eating into all my time!

So yes, feedback is much appreciated!


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